The One Who Got Away
by amehanaa
Summary: Loving him was as easy as breathing, but that wasn't enough to make him stay.
1. Chapter 1

_Hey, how are you doing these days? I'm trying to write a letter for you. The sky over there still must be beautiful. When spring comes, I remember you. Every day I remember you, even if it's not spring._

_It's as easy as breathing._

_When I think about you, I feel really lonely, but for some reason… I'm happy that I'm lonely. Weird, isn't it?_

* * *

It was the evening of the first day of spring.

He stood directly in front of me, blocking the nearly finished sunset. While the sunset rays streamed past the thin strands of his hair, wind mingled with air and flower petals gently blew against us and tickled our skin.

"Please, be my boyfriend!" I shouted, shutting my eyes because I was too afraid to see his expression. I gripped the strap of my schoolbag for support.

"Sure," he replied, his voice as gentle as the wind.

"Really?" my eyes shot open.

"You're cute, so why not?" he shrugged.

I stared at him until the air forced me to blink. This couldn't be right; he was _the_ Natsu Dragneel.

"What's your name?" he squinted at me.

"Lucy," I stated in a rush. "Lucy Heartfilia."

"I'll try to remember that," he said. "See you at the tutoring session tomorrow."

I watched his back become smaller and smaller as he strolled away, his scarf swaying behind him. I was completely stunned.

_Natsu Dragneel _had not only become my boyfriend, but he also noticed me during the tutor sessions. I felt as though I would faint, but I was happy—really happy.

Natsu was reckless. He always skipped class to go who knows where. He was only in class for about two hours while I was in class for seven.

Though each time we took a test and received our results, I would sneak a glimpse at his paper. I was shocked to see he made a perfect score. Not once had I seen him miss at least one.

Despite having perfect scores, Natsu always showed up at the lessons I tutored along with some other volunteers. He didn't do much; I think he was only there for the food.

Everyone was intimidated by his permanent vacant stare so we didn't say anything. Everything was alright as long as he had a pencil and a sheet of paper in front of him.

Natsu's empty look only vanished for a minute during each lesson.

The classroom had the perfect view of the sunset.

Natsu would never miss the chance to see the flaming colors of the sunset. I would never miss the chance to see the interest in his eyes.

It was something I enjoyed to look at and it soon became something I looked forward to. Somehow, I had fallen in love with it.

The only time I uttered a word towards Natsu was when the snacks were passed around.

It was a simple, "Here you go," but it took all my strength each time.

He only nodded in response, but it never failed to make my heart throb.

Along the way of viewing him for a few months during the tutoring sessions, I had fallen in love with the fearless Natsu Dragneel.

And today marked the day that he became my boyfriend.

* * *

"H-Hey, Natsu," I uneasily greeted the next day at the tutoring session. I had felt too shy to talk to him during class earlier.

"Oh, hey," he paused, trying to remember my name.

"Lucy," I finished for him.

"Lucy," he repeated.

I slid into the empty desk beside him silently. Observing the window beside us, the sunset was almost arriving.

"You don't talk much, do you?" I inquired, looking at the side of his head as he looked outside waiting for the sunset. I could see his collarbone peeking out of the hem of his shirt.

"Only to people I know," he replied simply.

I sat there wordlessly, watching the sky beside him. It was only the first day of being together and knowing each other, of course it'd be awkward. There was nothing I could do.

But it wouldn't hurt to try.

"What's your favorite color?" I questioned.

"There it is," he breathed out, ignoring my question.

But it was alright because instantly my heart pounded at his soft expression while he viewed the sunset. I had no idea it would look so much better up close.

"Red," he eventually answered.

"It makes sense," I replied.

"Where are the snacks?" he asked as soon as he had soaked in enough crimson for the day.

"I'll get them," I rose from my seat. Taking two steps away, I swiftly spun around.

"Do you want extra snacks?" I whispered in spite of knowing that it was against the rules to get more than one snack.

"Can you do that?" he gave me a look, though it was similar to his usual vacant one.

"Nobody will know," I assured. He reluctantly accepted; I knew he couldn't decline the opportunity to get more food.

"Here you go," I discreetly handed him two extra packages under his desk.

He nodded, like always. As his warm fingers brushed against mine for a second, my heart leaped into my throat.

I watched him eat his snack with my peripheral vision as I nibbled on mine. Never in my dreams did I think I would be sitting beside Natsu like this.

"What's your favorite color?" he asked.

"I like them all," I answered with a small smile.

He was probably asking to be polite, but it didn't matter to me.

"You can't like them all," he stated.

"Well, I do," I responded. "I'd feel bad if I was to pick just one color."

"You're a weirdo," he lightly chuckled, pushing himself up from his seat. "I'll see you tomorrow, Luce."

"S-See you t-tomorrow," I struggled to force out.

He was already leaving the classroom; I was glad he couldn't see how much work that sentence required.

"Luce," I murmured to the floor with a grin. I felt as if I was going to burst out in a fit of giggles any second.

It had a nice ring to it.

* * *

"Hi, Natsu," I greeted much more confidently the next day.

"What's up?" he asked, his sharp eyes already falling to the desk beside him with the expectations of me sitting in it.

"You seem to be working very hard," I observed his blank sheet of paper.

"I'm only here for the snacks," he stated bluntly.

"I know," I giggled.

"I'm counting on you to get me extra snacks. Don't let me down," he said with a voice that told me he was playing around.

Though it was hard to tell what emotion Natsu was feeling when he had one facial expression on at all times.

"Are you using me for snacks?" I inquired.

"Just a little," he responded.

I cracked a grin. At least he was honest.

"Don't let me down," he repeated when the snacks began to get passed out.

"Never," I promised as I rose from my seat and went to fetch the snacks.

Carefully handing him the extra snacks, I sat in my chair and watched Natsu.

"You look at me too much," he remarked.

"No, I don't!" I exclaimed, averting my eyes away. I turned my head away from him to stare at the floor.

"Especially when I watch the sunset," he spoke.

My body immediately became stiff.

"You noticed?" I squeaked like a child. I hesitantly shifted my head to him.

"It's okay," he assured.

"S-Sorry," I muttered as I twirled my thumbs around under the desk.

"You just get weirder and weirder," he responded.

"I'm sor—"

"You're interesting," he interrupted, rising from his chair.

"So are you," I blurted out while my eyes followed him already stepping away.

"You're more interesting," he replied. "See you tomorrow."

"B-Bye," I waved.

When he exited the classroom, my head dropped onto the desk loudly. I was grateful my hair spread across the desk and covered my face so I was able to grin without the fear of anyone seeing.

Like curtains on a stage before showtime, Natsu's curtains were swaying open.

* * *

"Hi, Natsu," I waved while I sat down at the desk beside him.

"Did you do something to your hair today?" he asked as he leaned in slightly to examine my hair with the hint of a curl.

"Y-Yeah," I did a small nod, my cheeks immediately heating up. I could see all the mixes of colors that created his hazel eyes.

"It looks good," he complimented, returning to leaning back in his seat. He raised his hands up to his head to form a nonchalant position.

"Thanks," I mumbled with embarrassment.

It was awkwardly silent for several moments. I felt as though I could scream.

"Hey, Natsu?" I spoke.

"Hmm?" he hummed as if he was too lazy to properly reply.

It was awfully cute.

"Can you walk me home today?" I requested.

"Why?" he lifted an eyebrow.

"Well," I paused to think before I said anything else. I didn't want him to think I was weirder than he already thought I was.

Thousands of sentences were struggling to leave my mouth.

"Boyfriends do that sometimes," I ended up settling with.

"Really?" he muttered.

"Haven't you had a girlfriend before?" I raised my own eyebrow at him this time.

"Yeah, but all they wanted was to have fun with me," he stated, hinting what kind of fun it actually was. "Don't you just want to have fun, too?"

"No!" I shouted, disturbed by the topic. I didn't notice the startled pairs of eyes on me until I took a brief glance across the classroom.

I gave them all an assuring smile, and when they turned back around, I looked back at Natsu.

"I just want you to like me the same way I like you."

"I like you," he spoke.

"I don't think you do," I shook my head stubbornly, ignoring the happiness that begged to blossom inside of me.

How strange that he could say it so easily.

"What does it mean to like someone?" he asked with complete seriousness.

I gave Natsu a hard stare; where did this boy come from?

"W-What?" I stuttered. "You've never liked someone before?"

He continued to give me a blank stare as I looked at him with bewilderment. How could someone like _him_ never like someone before?

"When you like someone, it means you want to be with them," I explained, feeling as if I was talking to a toddler.

"They're on your mind almost always. You want to hold their hand with all your strength. Even just the name of the person you like is enough to make your heart speed up."

"That's what liking someone means?" Natsu asked after I finished what seemed to end up sounding like a speech.

I nodded. "I'm pretty sure. But when it all comes down to it, liking someone is as easy as breathing."

"Easy as breathing," he repeated to himself softly.

"That's right," I continued to nod.

"Thanks for the extra lesson, Lucy," he said with a hardly noticeable smile.

"You're welcome," I replied as soon as the snacks began to get passed out.

"I'll be back," I stated while rising from my seat.

After hiding the extra snack from everyone else, I shuffled back to my seat to find Natsu's eyes following my every move.

"What are you looking at?" I inquired.

"You," he answered shortly.

"Obviously," I stifled a laugh. "But why?"

"Are you sure you like me?" Natsu suddenly asked.

"I'm sure," I replied.

Of course I was sure on my feelings. I was conscious of them for several months; they were inside of me for too longto be fake.

"How sure?" he questioned.

"W-What?" I stuttered with surprise.

"Show me how much you like me," he ordered with eyes that seemed to be lightening up with each passing second.

"Maybe about this much?" I estimated while raising my hands in front of me and leaving a lengthy amount of air in between my hands like I was holding a box.

"Only _that_ much?" he inquired.

"How much do you like _me?_" I retorted, knowing that would quiet him down.

"Right now," he raised his hands and imitated my movement. "This much."

My breaths stopped at the decent amount of air in between his hands.

"You're lying," I accused with a soft voice.

"I'm not," he shook his head.

"Prove it then," I demanded.

"Do you hear that?" Natsu asked as he leaned closer to me and began to inhale.

"What about it?" I questioned, listening to him exhale.

"It's as easy as breathing," he said, standing up from his desk. "Let's go."

"W-Where are we going?" I stammered as I blinked several times. Natsu was moving _way_ too fast for me.

I was also speechless at what just happened. My heart was beating like crazy, he could probably hear it.

"I'm walking you home, remember?" he reminded me.

"_You are?" _I gasped.

"I was told that's what boyfriends do sometimes," he responded as he began to walk away.

"H-Hold on!" I called out to him, shoving my items into my schoolbag. I rushed out of the classroom, not bothering to say goodbye to anyone.

"Why are you walking so fast?" I breathed out after finally catching up with him outside of the school.

"I didn't want to miss the sunset," he replied with his hands shoved in his pockets while he watched the sky.

I wanted to watch the sunset with him, but something about him wouldn't let me tear my eyes away from him.

"Luce, the sky is up there," he pointed up to the sky.

"Sorry," I muttered, forcing myself to look up at the sky.

It was beautiful as the orange clouds spread out all over the sky. It seemed as if at that moment the sky was frozen.

"Where do you live?" he eventually questioned.

"T-This way," I replied as I beckoned him to follow me.

"Why are you laughing?" he asked me after we had walked for some time.

"It's not bad to laugh, Natsu," I answered as if I was scolding someone.

Laughing was all I could do to express my happiness. I felt like I was going to explode any second now.

It wasn't long until I heard another type of laughter join my soft one.

I cocked my head at Natsu after noticing it was his laughter.

"Your laugh is contagious," he covered his mouth with a hand and averted his gaze.

"Don't do that," I said as I reached towards him and stripped his hand off.

"What are you doing?" he inquired.

"You have a nice smile," I stated softly. "You should show it more often."

"We'll see," he replied with his vacant stare returning.

Despite that, Natsu's eyes resumed shining.

My heart continued to ache as we walked to my home. Natsu and I were talking about our favorite types of food when he pulled out his phone.

I wordlessly listened to Natsu talk into his phone. I looked at him with disbelief at how much his tone had changed. He seemed to turn into a different person with that phone call.

After hanging up, his eyes flicked towards mine hesitantly.

"Sorry, Luce, but I have to go somewhere right now. I'll walk you home tomorrow."

"Oh," I spoke shortly.

"I'll walk you home tomorrow," he repeated.

"Tomorrow then," I nodded.

"Sorry," he apologized again.

"It's okay," I assured with disappointment floating into my body.

"Okay," he spun around and began to stride to wherever he needed to go.

Though my legs urged me to follow him, I ignored the feeling.

Wherever Natsu was going, it looked incredibly urgent.

* * *

As the days passed, Natsu attempted to walk me home. But it was always at the same spot he received a call and it was always the same time that he walked away from me.

I looked at Natsu's back more than I looked at his front. His scarf that waved behind him each time he walked away mocked me.

It was the second week when I had enough.

I enjoyed the moments we shared when I learned more about him and he learned more about me, but that day I was going to make Natsu walk me home the entire way.

"Luce, that's dangerous!" he warned me as I had hopped onto a stone platform beside the creek and walked on the edge.

Distracting him would make him forget about his phone, right?

"I do it all the time," I guaranteed, not bothered by the deep water that threatened to take me in.

"You're going to slip," he continued to warn while walking towards me to keep an eye on me.

"I'm not—"

"I told you," he muttered as his arms wrapped around my waist to prevent me from falling.

"This is the first time this has happened," I defended quietly, standing upright again. My waist tingled at his touch.

"Your waist is so small," he stated, taking a poking at it.

"No, it's not!" I proclaimed, wrapping my arms around my waist to prevent him from stealing another touch.

We looked at each other for a while; the stars that were starting to expose themselves were nothing compared to Natsu's bright eyes.

"Here," he offered his hand out to me so I could jump off the platform.

"Thanks," I mumbled bashfully as I slipped my hand into his.

We continued to walk and I glanced down to realize Natsu was still holding onto my hand.

"Why are you still holding my hand?" I questioned.

"Because I want to hold my girlfriend's hand," he replied, looking at me. "Is that bad?"

"N-No," I stammered. "Keep holding it."

"I will," he said, taking another step towards the direction of my house.

It wasn't until I took a step when Natsu pulled out his phone. I helplessly stared at him answer it.

"You have to go again, right?" I predicted when the call ended.

"Yeah," he scratched the back of his head.

"Where do you go?" I asked with a raised eyebrow.

"I have friends that want to hang out," he shrugged.

"Can't those friends wait?" I sighed, loosening my hand from Natsu's grip. "Go with them now."

Some small part of me hoped that he would pick me over his friends. A large part of me shattered when he didn't.

"See you tomorrow," he released my hand and turned back around to go wherever his friends were.

"That's it," I shook my head when I was tired of looking at Natsu's back for the day.

For the first time, I let the impulse I feel each time he walked away take over me.

I allowed my curious legs to follow Natsu until I entered a street that blared loud music. Groups of people were scattered across the long street and there was not one pink head in sight.

I took baby steps as I observed the people who surrounded me. Each girl seemed to have all make-up known to woman on their face while each man reeked of alcohol.

No doubt these groups mushed together were filled with gang members. Each person had similar symbols tattooed on their arms.

"What is this place?" I asked myself quietly. The music started to hurt my ears.

"Hey, cutie, nice outfit!" a voice slurred into my ear as a rough arm draped around my shoulder. "It's not often that I see a cute girl in a school uniform."

"Please, get off me," I demanded immediately, disgusted with the smell of the man's breath.

"How much can I pay you for you to—"

The intoxicated man didn't get to finish his sentence as he was suddenly punched. I couldn't hold back my wince after hearing a small crack by his nose.

"N-Natsu?" I stuttered when my eyes landed on the owner of the fist.

"What are you doing here?" Natsu inquired with large eyes.

"I wanted to see where you went off to every day!" I answered with a frown.

"Lucy, this place isn't safe for you," he reached for my shoulders and began to direct me to the exit of the street.

"I'm only leaving if you come with me," I stated as I forced my feet to stay planted on the ground.

"Hey, Flame-brain, who are you talking to?" a raven haired man came up to us.

"I'm leaving," Natsu responded shortly, his push on my shoulder becoming stronger.

"So soon? Boss will get mad at you," he warned.

"Tell him I'm feeling sick," Natsu said.

"Sure," he shrugged, turning back around and mixing in with the crowd.

"Lucy, move," Natsu ordered.

"Are you coming with me?" I asked, looking at him over my shoulder.

"Yes," he sighed.

"Okay," I replied as I began to move my legs out of the crowd.

Truthfully, I was glad to be out of there. The people there were intimidating.

"So that's where you go," I confirmed to myself when we exited the street.

We followed a path lit by streetlights, but Natsu quickly stood in front of me.

"Lucy, I never want you to go back there. Do you understand?" he commanded as his eyes pierced into mine.

Never had I seen this expression on Natsu's face. It was scarier than all the people on the street.

"Are you in a gang?" I whispered.

"It's a long story," he answered vaguely.

"Tell it to me or I'm going back to that place every time you leave me," I demanded.

We exchanged another look. Natsu looked furious, but soon his eyes began to soften.

"Let me walk you home," he signaled me to follow him.

We were silent as we walked to my home. Natsu was probably trying to think of a way to start.

"I'm in a gang named Fairy Tail," he eventually revealed.

"Is it a bad gang?" I asked in hopes that it wasn't.

"Aren't all gangs?" he countered.

"R-Right," I nodded.

"The gang took me in when I was in my second year of middle school. My dad had just abandoned me, so I didn't have anyone else. Fairy Tail became my second family," he explained.

"What is it exactly that you guys do?" I questioned.

"That's confidential," he responded.

"Oh," I spoke.

"I'm not proud of the things that I do, but I have no choice but to follow my Boss's orders," he stated.

"Can't you leave Fairy Tail?" I asked.

"Not even if I wanted to," he shook his head. "I have to stay in Fairy Tail for the rest of my life."

"Natsu," I began slowly.

"I don't need your sympathy," he waved me off. "I've learned to accept it."

"I don't want you to be in that gang," I confessed.

Natsu gave me a side glance. His face was orange due to the streetlights.

He gave me a smile that for some reason made my heart split into two uneven pieces.

"Sorry, Luce," was all he said.

And that was the last conversation we had for the rest of the night.

* * *

Something about Natsu being in a gang made my stomach flip upside down. It wasn't a good feeling.

Being able to see his red tattoo on his right bicep made me feel nauseous.

As a result, I found myself avoiding him.

I stopped going to the seat beside him during the tutoring sessions. I stopped giving him an extra snack.

I even stopped looking at his face when he looked at the sunset. After Natsu told me that the sunset was his sign that his boss had returned from a mission, I had no interest to see it anymore.

We were still boyfriend and girlfriend but it was simply a label now—nothing else.

It hurt. It hurt to know that Natsu was in a gang and he was stuck there forever.

It was clear in Natsu's eyes that he wanted someone to save him. Natsu's curtains were becoming tattered with each day that passed.

And that went for his physical curtains as well. Every couple of days a new bruise would be marked onto his body.

Yet I didn't do a thing.

Who knows how many weeks went by when Natsu had enough of me turning away from when he tried to talk to me.

"Have a nice evening, Lucy!" one of the volunteers waved me goodbye once the tutoring session finished for the day.

"You too," I smiled as I returned her wave.

I glanced at the empty seat in the back of the room. Natsu had left half an hour ago, but it had become a habit to look at his desk when I left.

I lightly hummed to myself as I left the school. The walks to my home were extremely lonely now.

The sunset was almost finished when I stepped outside. I took a moment to look at it, but a hand wrapping around my wrist interrupted me.

"Natsu?" I breathed out as he began to pull me with him.

He didn't say a word as he dragged me to wherever he wanted to take me.

"Isn't your boss going to get mad that you're not at Fairy Tail?" I asked nervously.

"It doesn't matter," he responded.

"I think it does, Natsu," I jerked my wrist away from his hold.

I looked him straight in the eyes for the first time in what seemed like forever.

"Right now," he snatched my wrist again. "It doesn't matter."

I was unsure on the whole situation but I allowed Natsu to lead me to the place he was taking me.

I looked down at his hand to see different colored bruises all over his arm. I pressed my lips together and averted my gaze.

His hand that tightly wrapped around my wrist no longer felt warm anymore.

Eventually, we reached a park.

"Sit there," he commanded, pointing to a bench.

I followed his orders without a complaint. Something about Natsu was strange today and it was terrifying to watch.

"How do I say this," he muttered to himself as he paced in front of me.

A street light flickered on beside us. Natsu took this as his cue.

"In two weeks, Fairy Tail will be going on a mission to assassinate the boss of Sabertooth," Natsu revealed.

"Assassinate?" I repeated incredulously. That was the only word that managed to register.

"In the neighboring town, I will be going on a mission to kill someone," he stated.

"Natsu," I whispered. Fear began to glaze over my heart but I stopped it immediately.

"Why are you telling me this?" I crossed my arms with a frown.

He gave me a look, his eyes hollow.

"I need to tell someone," he confessed. "I can't kill someone."

"Natsu—"

"Do I look like a person who can kill someone?" he inquired with an uneven voice.

"You don't have to do it," I stood up to put a comforting hand on his shoulder. "Your boss can't make you do anything."

Natsu viewed my hand that was placed on his shoulder for several moments.

He blinked a couple of times then directed his eyes at me.

"I have to do it," he said. "I have to keep Boss safe."

He sounded as if he was reciting something he was forced to memorize when he was little. His voice was drowning with pain.

Natsu had been brainwashed by Fairy Tail. I knew it and he knew it, too.

"Let's run away together," I spoke softly.

"W-What are you saying?" Natsu gave me a look as if I had three eyes. "What about school? Your parents?"

"All of that doesn't matter," I shook my head. "If we run away, then you won't have to kill anybody."

"I have to keep Boss safe," he repeated.

"You don't have to do this, Natsu," I pleaded.

"Forget I told you any of this," he stated, walking away from me. My hand that was on his shoulder slipped off and fell limply by my side.

I was sick of seeing Natsu's back so once I took a glance at it, I sprinted towards him.

"So we have two weeks together, right?" I asked breathlessly.

"Let's not talk about it," he spoke.

"Okay," I nodded.

"Let me walk you home now," he took a hold of my hand.

It was odd that I was holding a hand that had done so many things that I didn't even want to think of.

However, I didn't want to let go. In fact, I wanted to hold his hand with all my strength.

His troubles, his voice, his pain, and his thoughts—I hoped Natsu would let me hear them someday.

* * *

336 hours. That was how long Natsu and I had left together.

It seemed like a lot at first but when I blinked and noticed we had 168 hours left I couldn't believe how quickly time passed when Natsu and I were together.

Natsu was a ticking bomb that would inevitably explode someday. Yet every day, I fell in love with him more and more.

I was only torturing myself, but I didn't bother to stop it.

"I think I've fallen in love with you, Natsu," I confessed as we aimlessly walked hand in hand.

"How much do you love me?" he inquired with an amused look.

I had at last seen a handful of expressions Natsu held. Sometimes I think Natsu was surprised himself that he could create them.

"This much," I stated confidently as I released my hand from his to show him the amount of air in between my hands.

"Only _that_ much?" he scoffed.

"What about you?" I retorted.

My hands were still in the air, so he reached for them and spread my hands apart an extra inch.

"This much," he grinned so wide it was similar to a child's.

"Say it," I said softly.

"I love you," he replied with the same childish grin.

Those three words sounded like music to my ears, but the music stopped when Natsu pulled out his phone.

We shared a sigh when the call ended.

"I'll see you tomorrow," he leaned in to brush his lips against my cheek.

"I love you," I whispered.

"I love you, too," he whispered back while pulling away.

Natsu spun back around to head towards Fairy Tail. I sighed again after staring at the mocking scarf.

My cheek burned with the lingering sensation of Natsu's lips. It wasn't the first time he had kissed me, but warmth always spread across my body when he did.

36 hours.

That number haunted me and it only worsened when each hour passed.

Natsu wasn't at school that day. I wasn't surprised; he was probably getting ready to leave.

I had prepared myself for the worst, but a small part of me secretly wished that Natsu would stay behind.

Perhaps that was what he was doing? Pleading to stay for me?

12 hours.

Natsu wasn't at school again. Today was our last day together, yet I was alone.

Where was he?

5 hours.

Natsu wasn't answering my calls. Eventually, my calls went straight to voicemail.

Then there was nothing at all.

2 hours.

Natsu wasn't waiting for me outside of school like I expected him to be.

The walk home had never felt so lonesome before.

0 hours.

There was no, "Goodbye."

There was no, "Let's meet again someday."

There was no, "I'll always remember you."

Natsu was gone.

* * *

I was hopeless as each day would go by and Natsu would still be missing.

There was no news report about a handful of teenagers disappearing. They had all left without a trace.

"I hope you're doing well, Natsu," I told the sunset every couple of days.

I felt as though my voice would reach Natsu—wherever he was.

His voice never stopped flowing through my ears. I didn't want it to.

"Do I look like a person who can kill someone?" was the sentence that was stuck in my ears for about two months.

Days, months, and then a year passed. Natsu never left my mind.

Did I leave his?

I was a senior in high school now. I already had my eyes on a university I wanted to attend.

Was Natsu planning to go to college, too?

The walks to my house were lonelier than ever. My hums had gone back to being my company.

There were no calls from Natsu. No messages from him. Nothing.

I was alone, but I was still in love with him.

Was he still in love with me?

It almost made me want to laugh that Natsu and I never had the chance to break up.

Although it was somewhat comforting to know that he was still my boyfriend. Boyfriend was simply a label, but I couldn't help but love the sound of it.

I sighed after another lonely walk back from school. I stopped tutoring ages ago to focus on my future. But my future seemed quite dull.

A bright pair of eyes would have been nice.

It was my job to check the mail, so I opened the mailbox and hastily slid out all the papers. I skimmed over the mail but paused when a plain envelope caught my eye.

_Lucy _was written on the letter with crooked handwriting.

I had never seen the handwriting before, it was almost creepy seeing my name written like it.

I cautiously ripped it open with trembling hands. Natsu was the only thing in my mind.

I could remember his smile, his voice, his smell, his scarf, his _everything_ as if it was just yesterday.

My eyes scanned across the paper frantically wanting to read everything at once. Nothing made sense as I read each word.

It took me several tries to grasp what the letter said. And not to mention, the handwriting had thousands of erase marks.

But eventually, I understood it. And when I did, I memorized it until I could recite it in my sleep.

Everyday, I whispered to myself softly...

_Hey, how are you doing these days? I'm trying to write a letter for you. The sky over there still must be beautiful. When spring comes, I remember you. Every day I remember you, even if it's not spring._

_It's as easy as breathing._

_When I think about you, I feel really lonely, but for some reason… I'm happy that I'm lonely. Weird, isn't it?_

_Write me back sometime, Luce._

_Natsu._

* * *

**Happy New Year! 2014 was a great year for me and I hope 2015 is an even better year.**

**I hope that everyone has a great year as well. :-)**

**I had a lot of fun writing this one-shot. ****I've never written such a long one-shot in my life. This thing is 18 pages long, uwah. I apologize if it was boring at some points. :s**

**Well, anyway, I hope everyone enjoys this one-shot. ****Please review and tell me what you thought about it. **

**Thank you so much for reading. It means so much to me that so many people enjoy reading my silly stories. **

**Let's have a good year together, everyone. (ノ＞▽＜。)ノ**


	2. Chapter 2

_I still can't believe it's you. I feel like I'm dreaming each time we meet. You still haven't changed one bit, have you? Every day, I get happier and happier because of you. _

_I can't stop thinking about you. It's as easy as breathing. _

_You're right in front of me, but for some reason… I can't tell you what I want to tell you the most. Weird, isn't it? _

* * *

It was the morning of the first day of fall.

There were only five survivors after Fairy Tail's first and last assassination mission. The mission happened so quickly, I wasn't able to understand _what _had happened until it was all over. Somehow, I managed to get out alive. I was considered lucky to be one of the survivors.

There was blood everywhere. I knew the blood not only belonged to someone else, but me, as well. It was splattered across the walls, the floor, my clothes, and dripping on my hands. My hands wouldn't stop shaking even when I commanded my body to get a hold of itself.

The first thing I was told was that the mission was a success. The second thing I was told was that Boss was killed. I wasn't able to grasp what either of those things meant until a week after the mission was completed.

Without Boss, we survivors didn't know what to do once we found a hiding spot. Although we weren't far from Magnolia—at least that was what we were told—we weren't sure if it was alright for us to return home. We were always warned that we'd immediately be killed if we went straight back home after a mission.

At the time, I wasn't sure if being killed was a bad thing or not.

Boss always told us that we weren't allowed to take a single step until he told us to. So without him or anyone to tell us what to do or where to go, we mindlessly walked in the direction of the sunset. It was only natural for us to do. Whether it was taking us farther away or closer to Magnolia, it didn't matter to us. All we needed to do was survive.

The five of us lived under bridges and in sewers for several weeks. We transitioned to the nomadic lifestyle better than I expected, but there was always a part of me that didn't accept it. I was fully aware why, and because of it, not once did I ever believe this was how I was going to live forever.

Time was another thing I wasn't able to understand until a few months after the assassination. Living on the streets, time passed slower than how I remembered it did. Before the mission, time with her seemed to fly past us. But now, days stretched so long, it felt eternal. Each day felt the same, and there was no way to differentiate today or yesterday.

We survivors became somewhat of a team while we stayed on the streets together. We each were assigned tasks to do throughout the day in order to get food and warmth. My task was to make sure the fire never went out, and it was more tedious than I assumed it was going to be. But I got it done, just like how Boss would have order us to.

Every day, I knew time was passing, I knew time was being wasted, and I knew I had to do something about it. I wasn't going to accept the fact that I was going to be here forever. So, one night when we were all huddled around the small, crackling fire I created, I broke the news to everyone.

"I'm going to go back to Magnolia," I said.

"Not the first time we've heard that one," Gray, one of the survivors, laughed dryly.

"And do what?" Elfman, another survivor, demanded. "There's no one for you anymore, Natsu."

I clenched my fists, shaking my head while they nodded theirs. I wasn't going to believe it. _She _was there for me. _She _was the reason why I was considered lucky—why I was still alive.

"Who else do you have?" Gray inquired.

It took me a few moments to reply. The name had only been said in my thoughts, and I couldn't even remember how it would sound coming out of my mouth. Even the feeling of saying the name, I couldn't remember. Once I took a deep breath, I responded.

"I have Lucy."

"I didn't think you would have a girl back home," Gray commented.

I shrugged, not bothering to remind him that he had met Lucy a handful of times already. With all that we went through, the only memories we really wanted to remember were the ones that mattered most. The memories that mattered most to me, however, seemed to be more than others.

As we fell asleep that night, I was almost certain they forgot about what I said. All of us had claimed at least once that we were going to return to Magnolia. Now, each time one of us mentioned it, it was brushed off as if it was nothing.

We were stuck living like this forever.

Yet the next day, Gray disappeared. It wasn't until mid-afternoon when he returned to our area under the bridge. We would be lying if we said we weren't relieved to see that he was alright.

I was about to ask him where he'd been all day, but he was heading straight towards me with a crumpled map in one hand and a pen in the other.

"Come out with me for a sec," he beckoned me with a nod. When it was just us, he didn't hesitate to get straight to the point. Laying out the wrinkled piece of paper in front of us, he drew a large circle around the map.

"We're somewhere around here right now," he informed. "If this is the case, then here are the different routes you can take to get back to Magnolia."

I studied the several jagged lines of red that all ended up to Magnolia. I could tell that regardless of which route I took, it wasn't going to be easy.

"Why are you helping me?" I blurted out, dumbfounded. "Don't you want to go back to Magnolia, too?"

"You do know what going back to Magnolia means, don't you?" he countered. "You'll be out of Fairy Tail forever. You won't be able to get back in, even if you beg."

_Isn't that a good thing? _was at the tip of my tongue, but I swallowed it back. Gray had willingly joined Fairy Tail when he just turned six. The amount of brainwashing he endured the past thirteen years was inerasable. He was going to be tainted by Fairy Tail forever.

"How long is it going to take for me to get to Magnolia?" I asked.

There was a flicker in Gray's eyes, causing a wave of uneasiness to come over me. I knew I wasn't going to like the answer.

"A year," he revealed.

"A year?" I echoed, just to be sure.

"A year," he confirmed.

"Alright, then," I folded up the map and tucked it under my arm. "I'll do it."

I picked myself up from the ground, and I was seconds away from taking the first step to my new journey, but Gray grabbed my shoulder to stop me.

"How about you stay for dinner? You'll get to leave on a full stomach," he suggested.

This was surely Gray's way of telling me to stay for a little longer as our goodbye. This was the last time we were going to see each other, after all.

"Sure," I accepted. "Do I still have to make the fire, though?"

"Why wouldn't you?" he retorted.

The edges of my lips quirked up slightly. I tilted my head up at the sky, viewing the tangerine sky and all the clouds that surrounded it. The sunset always comforted me and gave me a sense of nostalgia.

Even though I was getting a late start, I wished that Lucy would still be waiting for me.

* * *

Walk.

That was the only word that was constantly repeated in my head once I began my journey to Magnolia. I only stopped when I had to, ate when it was completely necessary, and slept when each time I blinked there was something new in front of me. Sleeping was something I dreaded the most—my nightmares didn't stop until seven months.

Although it was just me by myself, I liked to think that the sunset kept me company, too. There were some days when it lasted longer than usual. It was comforting to think it was Lucy's way of talking to me. I was always the last one to say something.

I did start to feel lonely after a while. When I thought of Lucy, I couldn't help but feel lonely. But for some reason, I was happy that I was lonely. I didn't want this feeling to become a memory, so I held on.

Every so often, I'd catch a glimpse of my crimson Fairy Tail tattoo on my arm. It wasn't until I covered it up with my scarf when I would stop feeling nauseous. Despite this, I knew I wasn't ever going to remove the tattoo. This was my punishment. Even if I was out of Fairy Tail now, that didn't erase my past entirely. The tattoo was there to tell me that.

Weirdly enough, I was a bit grateful for Fairy Tail. Thinking of the good and bad made me _feel _something. It wasn't the best feeling in the world, but it was there, right in the pit of my stomach. And if I was still feeling something, I was still human.

Somewhere along the way, a nasty storm forced me to stop at a cheap motel for the night. I wasn't sure what to do while I stayed there, though after seeing a piece of paper on the nightstand, I got an idea. I was going to write a letter to Lucy.

Writing to her took longer than I expected. The pencil's eraser was nonexistent by the time it was written, even though the letter didn't have very many words. I hoped the erase marks weren't too noticeable. Folding it up and putting it inside an envelope, I placed it inside a random mailbox the next day as I returned to my adventure. I wondered if it would really reach her someday.

With my thoughts and the sunset, I continued to Magnolia even if it was freezing cold, pouring rain, or lightly snowing. No matter what, I was going to see Lucy again. I didn't care what it took. To me, there was no one else. I wanted to find the love I couldn't forget.

She was always on my mind with each step I made; it was as easy as breathing. When spring came, I couldn't stop thinking about her. Questions about her always raced through my mind. What was she doing right now? Was she still in school or had she graduated already? Was she thinking about me or had she forgotten? Was she still in love with me just as much as I was in love with her?

Days, months, and then a year passed. Lucy never left my mind.

Then, before I knew it, I was standing in front of a familiar high school. My legs felt like they were on fire, but I didn't pay attention to it.

It was nighttime, so the windows were pitch black. Even then, I could vividly see in the window where the tutoring sessions were held, and the days we spent getting to know each other. I wasn't sure why there was a feeling of warmth in my chest until I found myself in front of a house. The house was also pitch black.

"She doesn't live here anymore," I realized aloud. "She graduated already, huh?"

Since there was no point in simply staring at the vacant house, I wandered throughout the streets of the town I didn't realize I missed until now. I didn't dare go to the side of town where Fairy Tail was. I wasn't ever going to go back there again. Eventually, I paused at one of the stores to peek through the glass. Inside of the store showed the current date.

"Gray was right," I muttered. "It took one year to get here."

My eyes suddenly unfocused and once everything was clear again, I wasn't looking through the glass anymore. Instead, I was facing a man I had never seen before. Though when I rose my hand up in the air and the man mirrored my movement, I figured out it was me.

I looked… _Older. _So much time passed, I didn't even recognize myself anymore. Did that mean Lucy wouldn't recognize me, either?

I immediately began to shake my head, dismissing my taunting thoughts. Now wasn't the time to worry about those sorts of things—what I needed to think about was what I was going to do from here. Money wasn't going to be a problem since I had saved thousands by the help of Fairy Tail's missions.

Heading towards the park and finding a newspaper along the way, I made myself comfortable on a bench. I didn't like to read much, but I might as well. The moonlight was enough for me to read through the whole thing.

And as if it was another piece to the puzzle, after I finished reading, I found my answer on what I was going to do.

It felt strange at first, but it was going to bring me one step closer to meeting Lucy again. Using my scarf as a pillow to sleep, I made the bizarre and official decision.

I was going to go back to school.

* * *

Whether I would ever admit it or not, I knew for a fact that school wasn't my thing. It never was, even when I was a kid. Though surprisingly enough, I almost always received perfect grades. I didn't care enough to question it.

I found out through the newspaper that the next semester to Magnolia University was starting in exactly a week. I knew that I would pass the entrance exam with no trouble. And as expected, I did.

Only two days later and I was already moving into my new home in the boys' dormitory. Since I was accepted later than most, I was given a tiny, cramped room that was a college student's worst nightmare. I, on the other hand, was ecstatic that I actually had running water. I couldn't help but get excited at the window I had, too. Showering never felt so refreshing before.

It didn't take long to move in since I didn't have very many belongings. I stared at my plain room, lost in thought.

_I wonder if I'll be able to see her tomorrow. _

Skimming over the three classes I'd be going to tomorrow, I began to realize that Lucy may not even be taking the same classes as me, let alone be in this university. But still, my gut feeling told me she was here, somewhere. I still hoped I'd have a chance. And if we didn't have a class together, seeing her on campus would be enough for me. That was all I wanted.

"I guess we'll see what happens tomorrow," I sighed out while jumping into the springy bed. It was my first time lying on a bed in a year—the springs felt relieving on my back.

Ironically, my first night on a bed was spent gazing up at the ceiling. Scenarios of what could possibly happen tomorrow endlessly played through my head. I ended up watching the dawn shadows travel across my room.

Although I didn't get a minute of sleep, I felt full of energy as I got up from the bed and prepared myself for the day. I couldn't remember the last time I felt _this _nervous.

Viewing the university in daylight, I was able to see just how large the campus was. It was almost overwhelming, and being surrounded by so many different people made my anxiety rise. Fortunately, since there were so many students, I was just another face in the crowd.

Not only was the university big; so were my classrooms. I made sure I was the first one to each class so I would be able to look at every single person that entered. All I wanted to see was her face. I was only met with disappointment once I had attended two classes, and I hadn't seen Lucy once.

By my third class, my lack of sleep was starting to hit me. Arriving to the class early, I leaned against my arm for what felt like two seconds. When I opened my eyes again, the class was entirely full and it was starting. After scanning each and every face I could see in the whole room, I slumped in my seat. Lucy wasn't here.

I was utterly exhausted once the hour and a half long class was over. As everyone picked up their items to leave the classroom, I felt the urge to simply push pass everyone so I could head to my dorm, but I patiently waited until I made it to the door.

Leaving the classroom was when it happened. That was when I saw her.

She was standing outside of the classroom, speaking with a guy. Not only did their smiles match—their hair did, too. All my mind was telling me to do was go up to her, but looking at them was enough for my stomach to churn.

Did Lucy actually move on?

_Of course. It's only natural for her to. Did I really expect her to wait a year for me? _

All of the scenarios of me approaching her for the first time vanished from my mind in an instant. I blended in with the crowd as I went past her. Typically, this would be a moment when I punch a wall to express my anger, yet today, I felt numb. Number than I thought I could ever be.

It was unrealistic to think that Lucy would still be waiting for me after a year. Maybe I should have moved on, too. But I knew that was going to be impossible due to the feeling that surfaced in my chest each time I thought about her. There was no way in hell I was going to be able to move on.

Once I returned to my dorm, I didn't hesitate to go straight to bed, not bothering to change clothes. I lay on my stomach, my face shoved into the pillow.

_Her hair was brighter than I remembered. _

All of Lucy's features were brighter than they were in my memory. They subconsciously gotten fuzzier as the months passed. The glimmer of her brown eyes that I was able to steal a glimpse of made me regret not talking to her. I forgot how beautiful she was in person.

"Tomorrow," I spoke into the pillow, my voice muffled. "Tomorrow, I'll definitely go up to her."

* * *

Going up to Lucy was easier said than done. I had a new set of classes the next day, and she wasn't in any of them. Luckily, she had a class nearby my last one. Yet again, she was with the blonde guy. I wasn't able to bring myself to go up to her.

"Next day, for sure," I promised myself that night.

Returning to the three classes I attended the first day, my heart started to pound once Lucy entered the classroom. It was no wonder I didn't spot her the first time; she was sitting in the very front while I was sitting in the very back.

All of my things were packed before we were dismissed so I would be able to go up to her immediately after class. Though when class ended, she was with the blonde guy the moment she exited the classroom. She was already walking away with him before I had the chance to talk to her.

As the week progressed and I still hadn't spoken to her, I ended up trailing behind her, finding out all sorts of things. I eavesdropped on some of her conversations with the guy, whose name was Sting. I was able to find out where her dorm was, and how she was doing. She looked happy being with him. I was happy that she was happy, but it was at the end of the week when I had enough.

I was going to talk to Lucy.

Being this hesitant wasn't like me in the first place. If this was back in high school, I would have surely talked to her the second I laid eyes on her. Yet every time I saw her, my confidence wavered just slightly. It was a new, nerve-wracking feeling to me.

Since it was Saturday and there weren't any classes, there wasn't any doubt in my mind that I knew where Lucy would be. I hadn't been to a library since she dragged me to one during one of our dates, so I felt strange while going there. However, I didn't need to go inside. Lucy was outside, sitting at a table as she read a book. And for once, she was by herself.

My heart rate instantly began to accelerate as I instinctively stepped towards her. It was now or never. I held my breath until I was only a mere foot or two away from her. I was grateful her eyes were lowered so she couldn't see me. It took all of my strength to not reach out and twirl my fingers around the hair I loved so much, noticing it had gotten longer. Clenching and unclenching my fists, I spoke.

"Lucy?"

She was in the midst of flipping a page, her hand froze as I said her name. Slowly, she raised her head and faced me. Once our gazes locked, I felt like I got the wind knocked out of me.

"Natsu?" she questioned cautiously, her eyes flicking down at my scarf.

I nodded, wiping my palms across my jeans. "It's been a while, hasn't it?"

"Y-Yeah, it has been," she agreed, eyes widened with disbelief.

"How have you been?" I asked.

"I've been good," her voice started to become soft. "How about you?"

"University is a lot more different than high school," I attempted to lighten up the mood, though it didn't work in the slightest. An awkward silence started to form between us. Suddenly, we felt like strangers.

It wasn't until I heard footsteps when I turned to see who was coming up behind me.

"Hey, I'm back," Sting sat down in the chair opposite of Lucy's. Hardly noticing I was there, he turned to me with a dumbfounded expression. "Who are you?"

"He's an old friend," Lucy answered before I was able to. "His name is Natsu."

The left side of my chest became heavy in a matter of seconds. _Old friend _wasn't what I was expecting to be referred to.

"Well, nice to meet you, then," he sent me a friendly smile. "I'm Sting."

"Yeah," I replied plainly. I was about to ask if I could speak with Lucy alone just for a couple of minutes, but she didn't give me a chance.

"Well, we have to start studying now. I'll see you around," she told me with a small smile that didn't quite match her eyes.

"I'll see you later, then," I nodded again, ignoring the fact that she was shooing me away. Shoving my hands in my pockets, I left the same way I came. I could feel a pair of eyes staring at me as I walked; I wasn't sure if it was Sting or Lucy.

Despite it being a small and nearly meaningless conversation, I couldn't help but gain a boost of confidence afterwards. She had finally acknowledged me, and that was all that mattered.

Our eyes frequently began to meet before and after class a few days later. With Sting being attached to Lucy's hip, I didn't have time to talk to her again. But it wasn't long until I came to realize that Sting wasn't the reason I wasn't able to talk to her. _Lucy _was the reason why I wasn't able to talk to her.

Even if she would glance at me and I would promptly glance back, I could tell she was avoiding me the day she stopped waiting at the front of the classroom after class. Now, she was already outside by the time I was out of the classroom. A large wall surrounded her, and I couldn't get past it.

And as though it was a year ago, Lucy began to avoid me again. It brought back memories and feelings that I would have rather forgotten about.

Three weeks passed and the only time I had ever talked to Lucy was when I went up to her outside of the library. Other than that, we communicated with our addicting but unsatisfying glances. With the fourth week approaching, I started growing impatient. And as though it was a year ago, I was going to make her stop avoiding me again.

Thankfully, I knew just where to start.

* * *

Waiting for Saturday was almost painful. It was the only day I knew for sure where Lucy would be. And as expected, she was sitting at one of the tables in front of the library, her eyes travelling across the pages in front of her at the speed of light.

Before Sting could appear out of nowhere as he usually did when I was around, I went up to her. I had been jittery all morning, and I was certain she would be able to tell if I stood in front of her. Acting on instinct, I slid into the seat on the opposite side of the table. Once she peeked up to see who it was, she became stiff as she noticed it was me.

"I want to take you out to dinner tonight," I said instantly.

"E-Excuse me?" she stuttered, being caught off guard. "Natsu, I don't—"

"One bite," I cut her off, lifting my index finger up. "That's all you have to take. After that, we don't ever have to speak again. Deal?"

Lucy swallowed thickly as she thought about it. I had to hold back my sigh of relief when she hesitantly began to nod. "Fine, I'll eat dinner with you tonight."

A content smile started to form on my lips. "I'll meet you at the front of campus at seven."

"Okay."

"Okay," my smile transformed into a smirk. "See you then. I'll let you get back to reading now."

Pushing back my seat and leaving the table, I felt a pair of eyes gazing at my back as I left. The smirk on my lips was officially become permanent. Lucy's wall that I couldn't get past—I was getting through it once again.

I couldn't stop looking at the time once I returned to my dorm. It took about fifty glances for one minute to pass. Even when I paced around the room, time still remained at its lazy pace.

I ended up arriving at the front of campus thirty minutes early. It was beginning to get colder at night now; I hoped Lucy would be dressed warmly. I was only in a short-sleeved shirt, but she and I both were aware that I was a walking heater. My scarf was enough for me.

"You're early," Lucy's voice came up behind me eventually.

"So are you," I countered while spinning around. I was relieved to see she had a light sweater on with a scarf draped around her shoulders, as well. "You're ten minutes early."

"How long have you been waiting?" she asked curiously.

"Five minutes?" I estimated with a shrug. "Let's go now, I can hear your stomach from here."

"No, you can't," she giggled faintly beside me. Her laugh sent shivers down my spine.

"Nice scarf, by the way," I mentioned as we walked side by side.

"Thanks. I bought it last year," she responded.

Her response caused me to go silent, but before it became unbearable, I decided to make a joke out of it. "We're matching now."

Lucy nodded, looking down at our shoes while I looked straight ahead. It wasn't until I felt something warm on my hand when we both jumped and stared at each other with wild eyes.

"Habit, sorry," I mumbled, bringing my hand up to the back of my neck.

"It's okay," she assured. "Habits are hard to break, aren't they?"

I nodded, wondering if her hand was tingling as much as mine was. After peering over at her and finding her twirling her fingers around the frays of her scarf, I knew it was. I didn't know it was possible to feel so nostalgic by the touch of someone's hand.

"We're here," I presented once we had walked for some time.

"I've never been to this restaurant before," Lucy stated as I held open the door for her.

"I meant to bring you here once," I admitted.

"Why didn't you?" she questioned.

I swallowed, not sure if it would bring the mood down if I reminded her of when we rushed to do every single thing we could before I left to go on the mission. I shook my head. "I can't remember."

It was a dimly lit restaurant, giving each table a sense that it was the only table there. When we were seated, it felt as if it was just us. It wasn't necessarily a bad thing.

"So, how are you?" I asked awkwardly when we had both been silently skimming through the menu for what felt like hours.

"I'm good, how about you?"

"Hungry," I replied as I leaned back in my seat. "Whatever you don't eat tonight, I'm eating."

There was a flicker in Lucy's eyes before she responded. "Still haven't stopped eating extra food, I see. I'll try to save you some."

"Don't let me down," I remarked smoothly.

Now, the ball was rolling. I wasn't going to miss this chance. Switching topics left and right, I made sure Lucy didn't regret coming to dinner with me tonight. Soon enough, there wasn't a single pause in our conversation. No matter where the conversation went, Lucy and I began to talk to each other as though the year of separation didn't exist. We talked of nothing about the past, only about the present. We even forgot about our food until the waitress asked us how we were doing.

"This food is delicious!" she proclaimed. Her eyes were shining brighter than the candle in front of us. I was happy to see that her smile was finally matching her eyes.

"Isn't it?" I took a bite out of my spicy pasta. Although her eyes were already radiating, they lit up even more with each bite she took.

"Oh, right, about the letter you wrote me," she mentioned.

"You got it?" I perked up in my seat in surprise. She nodded with a smile, causing me to frown. "Why didn't you write back?"

"Well, there wasn't a return address," she laughed slightly. "I would have written back if I could, though."

"Oh, that's right," I spoke sheepishly.

"Where were you, anyway?" she asked, her tone becoming serious. I inhaled deeply as her gaze dropped to the candle. This was the topic I dreaded this entire night.

"It was terrifying not knowing where you were, you know that, right? Every day, I hoped that you were somewhere safe. It gave me anxiety to even think about it. When you randomly showed up in front of me the other day, I really couldn't believe it was you."

"I really couldn't believe it was you, either," I confessed.

"Can you tell me what happened?" she requested softly. "I promise I can handle it."

"I'll tell you," I confirmed. "It might take a while, though. Is that okay?"

"That's okay," she assured. "Go ahead."

I thought I was prepared to tell her everything, but I knew I wasn't. I had no idea what was going to come out of my mouth from here on.

It came out all at once. I started from the beginning, the night we left Magnolia. I told her everything that I could remember, leaving out the blood because we both were aware of her low tolerance towards it when eating. I explained that I wasn't involved in any of the killing, how lucky I was to be alive, how much we survivors endured, and what I went through in order to get back here a year later.

My troubles, my voice, my pain, and my thoughts—I let Lucy hear them all. I felt more and more vulnerable each second, but with Lucy, I felt safe, too.

"I came back because…" my shaky voice trailed off. I wasn't able to finish the sentence that the sole reason I returned was because of her. Thankfully, the glint in Lucy's eyes told me she understood.

We had already finished our dessert when I was done. I didn't know what expression I was expecting Lucy to have, but her tearing up was not one of them. My chest ached as she hastily wiped her tears. I didn't know lips could tremble so much. An apology was on its way out of me; she spoke before I was able to.

"I'm so happy," she whispered. "I'm so happy you're alive, Natsu."

"I'm happy that I was able to meet you again," I told her gently. "You never left my mind once, you know?"

"Same to you," a light laugh escaped her as more tears surfaced. I couldn't take it anymore. Leaning over in my seat, I brushed her tears away, not allowing any of them to roll down her cheeks. Despite my hands being incredibly calloused, I could feel her soft skin.

I wouldn't have minded if time stopped right there, and we would be in this moment forever, but there was a clearing of someone's throat behind me.

"We are closing in about ten minutes," the waitress informed.

"Sorry! We'll leave right away," Lucy surged up from her seat. A smile danced across my lips at her sudden burst of energy. Once I paid for our meal, we were back outside to the chilly night. We had only taken two steps when she abruptly stopped walking.

"What's wrong?" I tilted my head to the side.

"The dinner," she blurted out. She looked up at me with glossy eyes. "Natsu, I don't want to stop talking to you."

"What do you mean?" I inquired.

"You said that if I came with you to dinner tonight, we'd never speak again," she reminded, the quivering of her lips returning. "W-Why did you let me agree to that?"

I held back my smile as I reached for her hand. "One bite."

"What?" she tilted her head up at me with confusion.

"I said you only had to take one bite," I replied, rubbing small circles on the back of her hand with my thumb. "Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think you took a few more than that."

Lucy's eyes widened as a gasp left her lips. "Don't trick me like that!"

"It never gets old," I grinned. It felt foreign at first. I couldn't remember the last time I genuinely grinned. With that, I used her hand to take her with me as we returned back to the campus. All I wanted to do was hold her hand with all my strength.

"You're always teasing me," she sent me a pout.

"And I don't have any plans on stopping," I guaranteed with an unfaltering grin. I paused, not sure if I was in the right position to ask. I did, anyway. "By the way, who's Sting?"

I never wanted to ask the question in the first place, but whether I would ever accept it or not, the guy bothered me to no end.

"He's someone I tutor," Lucy answered. "You know, he actually used to be in a gang a few years ago."

"Really?" I turned to her with curiosity. "How did he get out?"

"He never told me," she shrugged. "All he told me was that he escaped in the middle of high school and never went back since. He doesn't like to think about it."

"Seems like you know a lot about him," I muttered before I realized it. I glanced at Lucy to find a sly smile on her lips.

"We're just friends, don't worry," she giggled.

"I'm glad," I began slowly, struggling to find the right words. "I'm glad you were able to keep living normally after I left."

"It was hard at first," she admitted. "I sort of always knew you would come back, though. It was weird, but I just couldn't deny the feeling I had in my gut."

"Never ignore your gut feeling," I stated seriously.

"I won't," she promised.

We were back to the university, and we were still hand in hand, Lucy leading the way to her dormitory. Though I had seen the building plenty of times, it felt more special being with her and dropping her off.

"Sorry, you can't come inside," she sent me an apologetic look. "I hate that they don't allow guys in after ten."

"I never would expect you to hate the rules," I teased. "I'll make sure to come earlier next time, then."

Lucy paused, smiling when she realized what I was trying to hint at. Before I could register what was happening, her arms wrapped around my shoulders for half a second and then she pulled back.

"Thanks for coming back. I'm really happy," she whispered into my ear. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight, Luce," I gave her hand a final squeeze before releasing it. We shared a smile as she went inside the building. I waited until she disappeared into one of the hallways.

A wistful, tingling sensation was vibrating all throughout my body as I strolled back to my dorm for the night. It felt surreal that we were back in each other's lives again. I wasn't quite sure what we were together, but I didn't care. As long as we were together, I was fine with anything. It would only be a label, anyway.

Though it would take time for everything to fall back into place again, I was willing to wait as long as I needed to. Because with Lucy, it felt as if we had all the time in the world just to ourselves.

* * *

After that, Lucy and I started to meet up with each other every single day. Of course, I had to wait until her tutoring sessions with Sting were over—which I _accidentally _made them cut short several times because I _accidentally _forgot what time we were planning to meet.

Not only did we relearn some things about each other as we went on dates, but we were also able to find out new likes, dislikes, and new interests we gained over the past year. Lucy still had some of the same habits, and it made me happier than it should have.

It told me that she was the same. She didn't change. Nothing was going to change anymore. Everything was okay again. It was just me and her, and nobody else.

There were some days where Lucy wouldn't let me out of her sight, especially if we were out in public. It wasn't until we were in private when she admitted that she was afraid I'd go missing again someday.

"I'm staying here with you forever, whether you like it or not, Luce," I promised as I pulled her body closer to me in her bed. Me secretly staying over in her dorm was a normal thing now; I didn't plan on getting caught any time soon. I ran my fingers through her lengthy hair, keeping to myself that I was in love with it. I stared at the shadows on her wall provided by the lamp.

"I never thought this would ever happen," Lucy said.

"What?"

"_This,_" she rolled over on the bed to face me, her hand caressing my cheek. "You're here, and even though you look a little older now, you're still the same. You have the same habits, the same smile, the same scarf, _and _the same smell. It's crazy to think about, isn't it?"

"Are you saying that you've been smelling me?" I smirked.

"Be serious!" she gave me a playful smack on my chest. "Don't you think it's a miracle? If you don't, I think there's something wrong with you."

"It's definitely a miracle," I nodded, pressing my forehead into hers. "You're my favorite miracle."

Her eyes pierced into mine and I didn't fight the urge to do what I wanted to do most. I closed the small space in between us, our lips carefully meeting up with each other. I began to cup her cheek, her lips responding in a way that made me want her even more_._ Our lips started fighting for dominancy, as though they wanted to impress the other.

"How happy are you right now?" I mumbled against her lips when we involuntarily parted to catch up with our breaths.

Lucy shifted onto her back, raising her arms above her and stretching her hands out. "This much. What about you?"

"This much," I answered as I added on to the amount of space between her hands by starting my space right next to hers. I entwined my right hand with her left hand to merge the large space together.

"Hey, you can't do that," she pointed out but a smile began to spread across her lips. She dropped her hands back down, turning her head to me.

"What are you going to do about it?" I challenged while propping myself up with an elbow.

She lifted a brow, her eyes telling me she had no intention on backing down. She moved closer to me, surprising me when all she did was give me a chaste peck.

"Just the expression I was anticipating," she grinned.

_Ah, I can't resist her. _

A scoff left my lips, not letting her being the only one to have the fun. As she took her next blink, I swiftly went on top of her, holding myself up by my knees.

"Just the expression I was anticipating," I echoed her words with my own grin as I leaned down to her, loving how her lips felt on mine.

This kiss felt different—a _good _different. Neither of us were pulling away, and our bodies felt as if they were connected. It was a struggle to even reach over and hastily switch off the lamp.

My hands moved on their own as they felt every single curve on her body, in love with each and every single one of them. Each time we touched it felt like there were fireworks popping all over our skin. I was addicted to the soft noises she made, the way she said my name, and her altogether.

I loved Lucy. I loved her so much.

And after that night, I knew that she was the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. We didn't say it to each other, but we didn't need to. By our kisses, I could hear it loud and clear.

I heard somewhere that the _morning after _was one of the best days in someone's life. I wasn't sure what to expect the next morning when I woke up and could feel the burning marks Lucy left behind on my back. I could still feel her fingers running through my hair, too.

A smirk played across my lips as I peeked over to Lucy's side to see what I had left behind on her body. However, instead of meeting up with her sleeping face, I was met with an empty bedside. Not hearing anyone in the bathroom, I raised myself up on the bed with confusion.

"Where did she go?" I inquired. It wasn't until I looked at the nightstand when I noticed a piece of paper with elegant handwriting swirled on it. Since I didn't have much—or anything, really—on I reached over to the nightstand without removing the covers on top of me.

I couldn't help but grin at the paper. It was the only thing I was thinking about as I leaped out of the bed and got dressed as quickly as I could, hopping all over the place.

While I nearly sprinted out of her dorm, I had already memorized what she wrote. Her voice was sweet in my ears as I repeated her words in my head…

_I still can't believe it's you. I feel like I'm dreaming each time we meet. You still haven't changed one bit, have you? Every day, I get happier and happier because of you. _

_I can't stop thinking about you. It's as easy as breathing. _

_You're right in front of me, but for some reason… I can't tell you what I want to tell you the most. Weird, isn't it? _

_I'm at our usual spot with some coffee right now. See you there. _

_Lucy._

* * *

**Happy New Year, guys! I hope that everyone had a great 2015, and will continue to have a great 2016! 2016 looks so weird on the corner of my screen, oh my goodness.**

**Last year when I wrote the first chapter to this, I received _so many _messages on people wanting a Part II and well... Here you go! I actually had plans on writing a second chapter anyway, so I was really happy to see that people wanted one. :-) **

**I'm sure you guys understand why I posted Part II a year later. I told myself to wait 11 months to write Part II because I knew I was going to crack and end up posting it like two days earlier instead, haha. **

**The amount of words to this chapter compared to last one is approximately 1.5k words extra and I have never written anything this long ever. There _has _to be some boring parts... Right? **

**I did realize over time that this isn't really as angst as the first part, and the only way I can defend this is that I'm wrote this for the sole purpose of closure, honestly. Closure doesn't always have to be angst, ya know!**

**Thank you guys so so much for reading! I will be updating my other story as soon as possible, I promise! Hope you enjoyed Part II!**

**Let's have another awesome year together! ~ヾ(＾∇＾)**


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